I haven’t written a blog in a while, so since tweets are like mini blogs, I guess putting a bunch together makes one big blog. I don’t know what’s sadder; that out of 228 tweets, there are only 12 good ones, or that these are the ones that I think are good. These are in no particular order.
As an entertainer, if I’m not willing to put honey on my nipples and let a bear into the room am I really doing my job?
Just Aced a Test. Now off to Ace your mom.
Can’t sing right now, too fat.
Fuck class… in the butt.
Carla is a violent ho.
My brain is so cloudy right now. Someone hit me with a fish.
I don’t listen to top 40 music. I listen to top 40 through 80 music.
sometimes armpits smell like weed
I heart ducks that look different than other ducks
One sock is white one is black. Unity.
My hat smells like cats and fish but not catfish
I just washed my hair in a bathroom sink at school and i feel pretty good about it.
I highly encourage you to respond with your favorite tweets you’ve written.
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I really want to hug and cuddle with a kitty or puppy right now…. I guess my stinky penguin will do for the moment.
I’m going home today, and hopefully find some (vegan)(plastic) easter eggs!
ew. my dog barfed all over the house. grosss
brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. its Nippy Noodles today.
being home is like being a kid set loose in a candy store…. I’m way too stuffed. and I miss my squishy boyfriend.
p.s. Matt is Morbidly Obese
I just washed my hair in a bathroom sink at school and i feel pretty good about it.
Lmao.
I’ve never tweeted so…
ridiculous. just ridiculous. here’s a good one posted by some twat named matt sevrens… “I need to trim my armpit hair.”
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